A Therapist’s Reflection: Anxiety - The Sunday Night Blues ahead of work on a Monday

“Not again!” you sigh to yourself as you recognise that sinking, nauseating feeling. Your body, mind and spirit are so familiar with those Sunday night blues, and you are dreading going back to work or university on Monday. Creeping self-doubt strikes next, “What if I can’t do this anymore? What if I get found out as an imposter? What if I get kicked out?” And predictably, that night you toss and turn and have a sleepless night.

It is not unusual to find yourself slipping into negative thinking habits, such as catastrophising, or being self- critical or subject to low self-esteem in this situation. However, there are practical things which you could choose to do which may be of help.

What can you do in this situation?

1. Name your feelings. Sit with them for a while and acknowledge them. Accept this is how you feel. Explore different reasons why you might feel this way. For example, you may have had a great weekend or a wonderful extended summer holiday and be grieving the loss of that freedom.

2. Reassure yourself that it is okay to experience some anxiety about returning to work or university studies on a Monday.

3. Breathe deeply and take some more time to process your feelings.

4. Talk to someone understanding about how you feel.

5. Imagine flashing forward to Monday evening after your first day back. What would you like to be saying about your first day? For example, maybe the day turned out to be better than you feared. It is likely that you would have been able to catch up with fellow students or colleagues. Perhaps you appreciated that your working day had structure which helped you complete some of your goals and therefore feel productive. Maybe you had the opportunity to help someone which might have felt good.

Focus more on how you want to feel at the end of that first day back. For example, there could be a sense of relief, or contentment, or maybe just happy tiredness and a greater sense of confidence as you think about the next day.

Now, if possible, imagine or visualise a film of you walking through your Monday from start to end with everything going well. For instance, everyone is warm in welcoming you back and happy to see you. Your work or lectures flow easily. You are acknowledged for the high standard of your work. A friend makes you or buys you a coffee or a tea…Try to enjoy that positive film.

6. Consider what attracted you to your studies or your job in the first place. How does what you are doing align with your value system? Try and think about and if possible, write down or record all the feedback you have had on your work which recognises your value system, attitude, progress, and work ethos.

Should your work or studies not align with your value system, it may be beneficial to plan an exit strategy or to change course. It may be helpful to find a coach or a counsellor to help you, if this is the case.

7. At the end of every day, before you go to sleep express gratitude for all the things which went well. Set an achievable and meaningful goal for the next day. For example, tomorrow I will help 3 people.

8. Plan a way to celebrate the end of your first week back. For example, meeting a friend after work for a drink, or organising a meal out, or a trip to the cinema.

Finally, try to reframe the way you see endings and beginnings. It is normal to grieve the end of a holiday and have a sense of trepidation about the start back to work or university on a Monday. Yet, a new start offers so many opportunities for learning, renewal and recommitment to studies or your chosen profession. In the words of Seneca: “Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end”.